Another truly beautiful episode. It keeps the suspense going, the way you write them totally out of order. Is that on purpose, or is that just where the inspiration takes you? That silence while you waited for Karen to respond to your "I love you" must have been truly nerve-wracking...or maybe not. Maybe you already knew deep down, and were hoping that this would be the moment that Karen realized it?

Sarah:

I write out of sequence to mirror my so-called mind and the way memory works. There is no present and past when the brain churns away. Things just get all jumbled.

See: "In Search of Lost Time," by Marcel Proust. The little French guy did it really well.

As for the loooooong silence, I knew nothing. I'm a dumb, clueless male.

I. Was. Dying.

P.S- That was perhaps the most beautiful chapter in the series.

Robert,

Great installment....
I could picture you fighting the elements....
Wind and rain whipping your face.

That is what true love and devotion is all about.

Anonymous:

I captured the wrong link. Thanks so much.

So you just...took a risk. Hey, even for a man, emotional risk is still a risk! I'll bet you're really glad you did.
That's what I figured about the writing out of order thing.

Lance:

Thanks so much. can you also see me drenched to the bone, fingers and toes like ice? It was great.

Sarah:

I took an emotional risk, true. But ask any man, we'd much rather risk mortal combat to prove our love. Yup, we're that nuts.

L'Havdeel: "Eyn M'ukdam, U'M'uchar B'How I Married Karen."

Robert, this beats all those romance novels I continue to work on.

Everyone needs and deserves an "I LOVE YOU" moment in their personal love stories.

It can be like treading on thin ice when you dance around each other, wanting to say those words, but perhaps not wanting to be the first to do so. If you both fall into the lake together, because that ice has broken, now you've each declared that love, then you can save each other. (does this analogy make any kind of sense?)

Damn, you made me cry with this one!

Being that it's actually my first time commenting here, I prefer to remain anonymous for now. Hope it doesnt bother you. I've been an avid reader of Seraphic Press for a very long time now, and today your new chapter moved me so much I couldnt help commenting.

Just out of curiousity, does Karen screen your installments before they are posted?

As a MSM journalist, I'm going to have to get this story straight chronologically and factually for all the readers. The good news is despite the changes to a couple of facts, this is still a romantic tale of a determined man in love.

Let's get the scene correctly:

1) This was the Upper West Side in the late 70's... so no black nights on horseback with swords, but there were quite of few menacing toughs with black leather jackets on stolen bikes with switch-blades. This trip did indeed take place at night, and Gore Tex is no substitute for a suit of armor. Robert was a brave knight indeed!

2) No way Robert could emulate Gene Kelly's scene in "Singin' in the Rain"... because said leather-jacket-wearing toughs would have pounded him and stolen his umbrella. Plus, there was more dog poop on the streets at that time than any rain water. The real fancy footwork was Robert's ability to avoid any mounds of uncurbed dog. (And I suspect it was those hoods who stole the "g" in "Singin'.")

3) That wasn't a branch that broke the apartment window. It was an empty beer bottle thrown by some guys in the alley below who had been yelling "Viva Trujillo!" for a solid hour.

4) Robert could have easily had those two Colt .45's... (okay Saturday Night Specials), had he simply gone to Karen's apartment via Riverside Park. But he wanted to be a hero, not a martyr.

5) When Robert first picked up the phone, it actually wasn't Karen but some pervert heavy-breather who had been calling his place for the previous 6 1/2 months. BUT once Robert got rid of him, Karen did call and they told each other of their love.

Ahhh, I am....completely....breathless.

But one question. If it was so bad out, why didn't you just sleep on the couch and wait out the storm?

Pearl:

Now, now, take it easy. Here's a tissue. Blow your nose... that way, please. Okay now, feeling better?

Darn, Pearl, you have to tell your employers that the real romance is in Seraphic Secret.

Anonymous:

Welcome to Seraphic Secret. Hope that you soon feel comfortable enough to use your first name.

In answer to your question. Yes, Karen usually does read my posts beforehand for the following reasons:

1.This blog is a partnership.
2.To make sure that my my memory is functioning properly.
3. To assure that I don't horribly embarrass her by letting slip that--

Oh, you see, almost got by me. Whew, that was close.

Jake:

It's hard to believe that you work for CNN, the network who more than almost any other, get everything wrong. Your investigative skills are, golly, scary. You have awesome human intel for you got it all right, right down to the, er dog poop.

What can I say, I'm in awe.

I hear the NY Times is ready to give you Maureen Dowd's job--if you come in as a eunuch.

Robert, is your life real? Just kidding, but your writing is so amazing, it gives your real life a fairy-tale quality!

Yay, Robert...more Robert loves Karen!

Stacey:

I did not sleep on the couch because it would not have been proper nor modest.

Dovid:

Is my life real? You know, that's a very good question. I'm going to ask Karen.

Hold on.
Be right back.

Karen says: "Reality is an on and off thing with Robert."

Okay, now that's a pretty terrifying diagnosis.

Anyway, how goes the learning, Dovid? Or are you spending all your time reading loony blogs like Seraphic Secret?

You could have claimed pikuach nefesh and or offered to sleep in a plastic bag. Either or might have kept you inside the apartment. Or maybe not.

But I have to agree with you about the desire to go into battle. There is something so intriguing and dare I say manly about fighting for a woman.

Men are so crazy. The crazier thing is that women seem to love it. Robert and Karen are A-dorable.

Oh, men are completely crazy. Utterly and totally nuts. Women are completely crazy too, but in a different way. (Actually, women are such a complete mystery that I am not sure I can say definititely that they are crazy, but I think so).

What year was that? Man I used to live right there also. 76th off Broadway. We used to hang out at the one kosher restaurant in the area at the time. Irv's Deli on Broadway.
This was in 1979. Maybe we knew each other back then?

Becoming a eunuch is actually not a requirement to get Maureen Dowd's job... sleeping with one or two managing editors is. I'm not sure which experience would be more uncomfortable for me. Until that changes, my editorials will only be seen in Newsday and my Top 10 lists are in The Jewish Week, (with some special previews here once in a while). They're much smaller papers, but they leave my copy alone.

Jack:

For those who are not conversant in the Hebrew language and Talmudic law: Pikuach Nefesh, means, "a life at risk" and almost all Jewish laws are set aside in order to preserve life.

Sooooo, Jack is suggesting that I should have invoked this clause to Karen and her roomies and then spend the night on the couch, safe sound and dry.

To which they would have responded: "Robert, Karen told you not to come over, you said it was fine, thus Pikuach Nefesh, cannot come into play."

And they would have been 100% correct.

Sarah:

And to this let me quote the Bard:

"I have thought some of nature's journeymen had made men, and not made them well..." Hamlet

Michael:

First of all, thanks again for participating in our contest. Your photo was a true wild card.

Men are crazy. Women too.

It's amazing that society functions as well as it does, don't you think?

Like Pearl, you made me cry with this one. Perhaps because I, like Karen, did get a man with a warrior's heart.

Kenny:

Welcome to seraphic Secret, I believe this is our first meeting.

Anyway, the year was 1976. The month of August. We did not know each other. I had few friends.

I remember seeing people hanging around outside Irv's Deli.

Confession: I thought they were bums -- er, homeless people begging change. I used to scoot over, cross the street to avoid them.

Sorry.

I don't need a guy to slay dragons for me. I don't really want him to put his life in danger. What I'd like is to see that he puts himself out for me, that he thinks about me - whether it's going out of his way to see me, or finding the gift that will put a smile on my face.

Jake:

Your Top Ten lists are the highlights of Seraphic Secret's day.

Earth Girl:

Can I hand you a tissue?

Or will your warrior man lop my head off with a two-handed broad-ax in a pique of jealousy?

Welcome to Seraphic Secret.

Posts like this, is why I stop whatever I'm doing, to check out your site daily.
Wow!
Your bravery was commendable. And that Karen understood it for what it was, is even more commendable.
Too many women don't appreciate their men, expecting knights on white horses, or samurai warriors (who also write poetry, play rock n roll and are great providers) - without realizing that just going to work - for their women - is the battle many men fight every day.
Beautiful how you expressed your love for your woman. More beautiful how she understood.
Now that's Basherte.

Mata Hari:

Seraphic Secret has heard you. We have registered your heart's desires and we are looking...

RA - actually, that wasn't a request...i was just contributing to the conversation...but hey, by all means...find mr. dreamboat - my mc'dreamy :)
(i'm assuming you watch grey's anatomy)

Yael:

Always good to hear from you.

You are soooooo right! Today's battles and jousts are men's workplace, where thriving, surviving and rising can be utterly cut-throat.

I have seen men who feel their workplace battles are not properly appreciated by their wives.

Ladies, take a handkerchief, then, the next time your husband comes home exhausted, beaten down, sad --

Hand it to him, tell your man that he is your hero.

Life will be good.

Mata Hari:

Isn't it nice when you step out of the shadows.

Oops, sorry, I do have a tendency to be...

"What's the word, Karen?"
"Concrete."
"Thank you."

Hey, we do watch "Grey's Anatomy." How did you know? As for your McDreamy: he is out there, somewhere, and we are on the case.

Jake, OY VEY! That woman will tear your throat out!

PS...see what I'm learning at this site?? oy vey..snicker

Robert, I love this post. Its so sweet to see your memories come to life. Karen is a lucky woman, and she not only loves you, she knows you well :) (reality is an on and off thing)

PS: I hope you know my snicker in the above post was at me, like I really know what oy vey means.

This "chivalry is not dead" mode, this poetic soul persona, this chocolate and flowers trend -- presented by the man in your life -- does not have to be perpetual, ongoing. I think it's even more special when these qualities surface infrequently.

Doing so lends itself to a "nice surprise" factor; when you least expect a poem or a love note, you'll get one. When you least expect a rose at your place setting, you'll find one. When you least expect a "Honey, you sit down and blog, or read Seraphic Secret for a while; I'll do the dishes and put the kids to bed," you get one.

I'm a romantic by nature and I'd have thought that I'd have been disappointed to not find a mirror image of myself. But I did find him...and I continue to find him...whenever I least expect to!

Suz:

We are so glad you're getting a Seraphic education.

Here at Seraphic Secret, we take great pride in our newly instituted and highly subversive Educational Division. Subversive you ask, in what way? Well, step into class.

1. Recite The Pledge of Allegiance every morning--to America, not to Cuba or Venezuela.
2. The Ten Commandments are prominently posted on our blackboard.
2. We teach in English. Only.
3. No Multi-cultural Studies Dept.
4. No Women's Studies Dept.
5. We do no accept contributions from fanatical Wahaabi Saudi tyrants to establish so-called Middle-Eastern Studies Departments in our university. These "studies" are, in reality, brainwashing schools of official academic Anti-Semitism, usually chaired by leftist Jewish professors. See: Columbia University, Princeton University, Harvard University, the list grows and grows.

As should our will to resist.

Cool, Seraphic University! Can we have a football team? Is Lance the only other college football fan here? He can be the GM... I still have 4 years of eligibility left and can still take a hit from a linebacker, (not from Suha Arafat, please... but I think I could survive a big-time college game)

*Sigh*

(Deep breath, trembling a bit.)

*Sigh*

(That warm, giddy feeling in the region of the heart.)

*Sigh*

Jake, I like your idea....

We actually need a full blown athletics department....mens and womens sports....

Let's start recruiting.

WOW English-only. I think the ACLU will be after you quickly so I'm not even going for cheerleader try-outs.

I guess we can't play on Shabbos... but I went to Columbia and the team hasn't really played on Shabbos or any other day since we won the Rose Bowl in 1934!

If Yeshiva of Flatbush had a football team, I would have rocked. At least that's what the coaches at basketball tryouts told me.

Jake,

I am just short of 37. I play basketball two to three times a week and around twice a year play noseguard in a tackle football game against college students.

Consider that my way of saying I want to play on the team too.

Robert,

In reference to my earlier comment about Pikuach Nefesh, I would have had a response to their dissent.

It would have been something along the lines of there is an obscure Gemara in which Ben Shimon discussed what to do in a similar situation to the one you are facing.

Of course, the next question is what is that situation and how does it apply. There is an answer to that as well, several really.

It is all about selling the story. Not that any of this matters.

Thus sayeth the imaginary pirate turned vicious lawyer.

-Jack

Playing on Shabbat isnt a problem anymore....Look at all the games on Tuesday....Wednesday...etc...

And dont forget we will need a basketball program too.

And you don't have to look far for an able coach...
In my stint as an intra-mural coach I helped lead the YULA team to the final four.

Unfortunately, the league folded the next year.

Then we will slowly expand our sports menu to include basball...softball...and other sports.

You really think "Singing in the Rain" is better than "The Sound of Music"?

(Sorry - just egging you on)

Seraphic University

Founded 2006

Co-Presidents: Robert and Karen Avrech

Degrees Offered: B.A. (Blogger of Arts), B.S. (Blogger of Sagacity)

Enrollment: ????

College Song, (sung to the tune of ‘Oh Tannenbaum,’ --- no religious disrespect intended):

Seraphic U., Seraphic U.
To thee we give our love.

The fields are green, the cholent’s warm
It fits us like a glove

Online our bosses think we’re hard at work
But if they knew, they’d go berserk

Seraphic U., Seraphic U.
We pledge our hearts to thee

A blog of love, a blog of truth
It fills our days with glee

We learn, we laugh, we do it all
Avoiding the usual internet vitriol

Seraphic U., Seraphic U.
Our school is blessed from above!

Jake: you've got it going on! Great stuff there.

I received a 4-year, all-expenses-paid scholarship to Seraphic U., worth more than the scholarship University of Toronto ever gave me. But then again, in those years, I was only an English major with a Jewish Studies minor. These days, I'm a BLOGGING major.

Bravo Jake!

Is it too late to get our school song entered in tonight's Grammys? Is there anyone who watches the Grammys anymore?

Is there anyone who watches the Grammys anymore?

I would rather watch CNN then watch the Grammy's. ;)

Oh well, you're out of luck because right now we're doing a story on the Grammy's. This may be the truest definition of "Gornischt mit Gornischt" of all time.

Actually, I watch FOX and CNBC while I work....though I really dont like Studio B....Shep drives me nuts.

It will be interesting to see if FOX starts its own business channel....The rumor is that it is coming at the end of the year.

Why would that song give any religious disrespect? The president of our shul for many years was Max Tannenbaum. (Um, that is who the original song is named for, right?)

You know Max Tannenbaum? I love that guy!

We also need a manly way to get all misty eyed at a proper romance.

Sigh.

You're on to something, Robert. There's a reason why in the past month I've returned to Beowulf, Roland, Aeneas, and Joshua.

Your particular reminscence reminds me of a simpler one my mother once told me - all smiles, 40 years later - of when she was a bobby-socked highschooler in 1940s Chicago. Her boyfriend, who was on the football team, swept her up off her feet in the end zone after a game....

Hi Robert,

Been reading these stories for quite some time, but this one was the most moving one. Definitely. And I agree on the warrior stuff :-)

Jake:

Regarding the sports program at Seraphic University. It is unique. Here's a rundown:

1. We have a Jousting Team who enter the lists in full steel armor.
2. Our Fencing Team duels using razor sharp swords.
3. We also have a Sharpshooting Team who fire full metal jacket loads.
4. We do not have cheerleaders. Noooooo.
5. Instead, we have Ladies who wave silken handkerchiefs and cry out things like: "Unhorse the scoundrel, M'Lord." And: "Disembowel the villain, M'Lord." Classy stuff like that.

Sara:

Hold on, Lance, Jake, Jack, somebody get the fainting couch for our deeply sighing friend.

Robert,

Dont forget full contact hand to hand fighting, in the tradition of Bruce Lee.

Also, we will have expert classes on the proper usage of the samurai sword.

Add to that, Sun Tzu's the Art of War...which will be required reading.

Suz:

The Seraphic Sharpshooting Team uses ACLU lawyers for target practice. The benefits to society are incalculable.

Pearl:

We are so glad that you continue to continue finding your mirror image.

Kyle:

You bring up an interesting problem: a manly way to get properly misty-eyed.

I speak only for myself when I recommend crying and sniffling like a girl and then claiming: "It's allergy season."

forsooth

Sered:

Welcome to Seraphic University.

Our motto is:

Where Men are Men -- and Women Have to Have a Sense of Humor.

Jeremiah:

Ah, the great books, currently being trashed because they are written by Dead White Authors.

And football in the old days, before players were illiterate thugs who perform vulgar little dances of self-promotion at each little touch-down.

umm...disembowel the villain? Do we really have to say that?
makes me a little queasy

Okay, I'm a pragmatic woman. (Ask my husband.) I believe in historical accuracy in all great tales of romance. Are you sure it was Gloria? I remember Gloria in our "new" house, to which we moved in November 1979--after hurricane season. In fact, I'm pretty sure the hurricane was in 1985, because I remember staying home from eighth grade. (Okay, I just checked, and it was in 1985.) Wasn't this a different hurricane? Ask Karen and see what she says.

Personally I find defenestrating my opponents to be quite satisfying.

Robert, I think you DO need cheerleaders. I'd be happy to be a cheerleader...although I was kicked off the drill team in High School...do you think that's a bad sign?

Did someone mention Mc Dreamy? I looooooove Patrick Dempsey. He AND Paul McCartney both forgot to marry me...but that's for another blog.

Ok, let me get this. We (the women) will not be allowed to cheer for the manly men...."Give us an M..Give us an A...Give us an N..L...Y! Go Manly Men!!" Additionally, we will be required to encourage them to disembowel the enemy AND, to watch same? Hmmmmmm...Texas A&M is looking pretty good to this Texas woman.

Okay Suz, it's you and me..."Give us a D, give us an I, give us an S, give us an E, give us an M, give us a B"...well, you get the idea.

Uberimma:

Hit your refresh button. You will find that Hurricane Gloria has been replaced by the historically accurate Hurricane Belle. I made a mistake and Jake corrected me. The great thing about the internet, as the extremely bitter Dan Rather can testify, is that someone will correct you.

Randi:

That you were kicked off the drill team in high school is a good sign. It means that you were already working on a higher level--a Seraphic level, so to speak.

Suz:

But really Texas A&M, it's just the same ol' rah, rah rah.

I'll tell you what. how about our newest course at Seraphic University: "Siege Works For Women 101," What To Do When Your Husband's Away and Your Castle Falls Under Siege by 100,000 Bloodthirsty Muslim Lunatics.

Highly Recommended.

Robert...this makes comment number 80...I just couldn't stand to see it sit at 79

...and counting.

(Randi, I think Robert is beating Neil Kramer's stats in his comments. It's about time!)

LOL you guys are funny, this blog is great and over 80 comments on a simple continuation of a series?? wooohooo Forget the simple continuation, this is an absolutely perfect piece of the story. I love the way you love her, Robert. I read the story again and it is sweet and reminds me of the sweet boys who loved me as a young girl. None of them matched your endurance but they were sweet.

I meant 1977 actually. But you would have gone there for Kosher food, I don't think there was much else in the area at that time.

The dairy rest. on Broadway and 72, and a bakery, and Irv's. So many frum people hung out there at Irv's, college students, yuppies, Carlebachians, etc...

Then he had a fire there, and finally re-opened months later.

There was talk that the fire was started by a disgruntled dishwasher, but it was never proven.
Alot of dishwashers then tended to be ex-cons.

Now we get illegal migrants from G-d knows where.

It's official!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seraphic Secret is Number 1!!!!!!

http://info.jpost.com/C005/BlogCentral/JIB.2005/

Mazel tov, mazel tov! Cool! Congrats! Oh, I should have said, "Godspeed, good sir, and...congratulations!" or something. I'm waving a hanky, too.

I am so totally in a swoon

Hey, it's time for a Seraphic hora! (circle dance)

Mazel tov.

Congratulations! Where's the party?

Suz,
Where are you?...time for a cheer...get your pom poms ready...I'm waiting on top of this pyramid...HURRY PLEASE...can't... balance... anymoooooooore...
BOOOOM! (ooops)

Robert, I guess as the winner, it will be you now who "comes down the red carpet wearing a Chanel gown, cut on the bias, natch, Manolo Blahnik heels, and jewels by Harry Winston."

You know what? Let's leave that outfit for Karen. You can wear a handknit vest and wrinkle-resistant khakis and deck shoes, and come riding out on a white steed to collect your prize.

eh,hem...excuse me Pearl, I believe that was my gown, shoes, and heels. Anyway, I've seen Robert in heels...it's not a pretty sight.

Yikes, I missed ya Randi, hope ya didnt get grass stains on our cute little skirts....next time...

GAAAHH!!! I've been in so many straits in desperate need of zatoichi blindness (to shield me from the beauty of whom I shall archetypally call Her..yet only to be decimated by the telltale crackle of her 5 foot voice...OK so there is a Her behind Her), and a sword cane. You speak what I cannot to what I can not; woman. single 30-something orthodox maledom is the most emasculating context our species has "evolved".

Pierre:

Huh?

He means he's having a tough time finding a shidduch.