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July 07, 2006
Hey Kids, Let's Put on a Blog!
How to express what we are feeling, what we are thinking?
How to harvest those special interests we have privately nurtured for years, for decades; the hobbies and avocations our parents assured us are silly, unrealistic, positively useless.
What to do:
With the white-hot outrage...
With the bottomless grief...
With the endless love...
More precisely: where to plaster these thoughts, musings, suggestions, less than precise ponderings?
What to do, and where to do it?
In May of 2004, bereft over Ariel's ZT'L death, our good and generous friend Jackie Danicki gently convinced us to go online, to begin blogging, hence Seraphic Secret.
This blog, this forum of all things Seraphic has altered our lives.
Our readers, our commenters, our Seraphic community provides friendship and nechama, condolence, when, at times, it appears that these qualities have been leeched from the universe.
One of our great pleasures as Seraphic Secret becomes less of a secret is to see some of our faithful readers create their own blogs. Often, they will tell us that we have inspired them.
In those words we find happiness, we find contentment.
Karen and I feel like Godfathers to Pearl, one of our first and most generous reader/commentors, whose Pearlies of Wisdom is one of the most beautifully written personal blogs in the Jewish world.
Pearl looks at her family and community and discovers, well, the Universe. Every morning, after I daven, after I eat breakfast, before I check my mail, before I read any other blog, I check in with Pearl, for it is good to begin the day with a poetic view of domestic life; a view that is both simple yet profoundly soulful. Also: look for Pearl's whacky wordplay; this woman cannot resist.
The next Seraphic Secret reader to go off on her own was Randi, our Cruisin' Mom, whose glorious blog is at its very best when she dreamily takes us back to her Valley childhood.
These are innocent days of golden California sunshine, red Corvettes, big surf boards, and exciting trips to Westwood. Cruisin' Mom surprises with her offbeat humor. She's the Seinfeld of the Jewish bloggers in that she weaves narrative out of, well, seemingly nothing.
In truth, she's become such a crafty writer that she's able to bluff. You're caught up in the Southern California narrative--and you don't even know it. I have to tell you, as a professional writer, I sometimes marvel at her ability to pull it off.
Cruisin' Mom also hits powerful emotional buttons because her idyllic world splits like tree bark when her beloved father suddenly dies when she is but 10-years-old.
And absolutely don't miss Cruisin' Mom's hysterical entry about going shooting with yours truly for the very first time. Here, this innocent soccer mom, this rabidly anti NRA liberal Democrat turns into a trigger-happy, gun crazed femme fatale. It's a classic.
He was a committed revolutionary Communist, a fanatic devoted to the overthrow of the American way of life. Baruch HaShem, he came to his senses, realized that he was in league with a most evil and destructive ideology and started on the path of a Baal Teshuva.
It was but a year ago that Seraphic friend Jeremiah began commenting on Seraphic Secret. Immediately, his unique literary style attracted attention. Jeremiah, it was clear to all Seraphic friends, was and is, an original and really, the comments section just seemed too small, too confining for his considerable intellectual powers.
Now, we have Jeremayakovka.
The blog's name?
Here's Jeremiah's explanation:"Its concept emerges from the three valiant personalities from whom I've fashioned its name, out of which I intend to shape its substance: the prophet Jeremiah, poet Vladimir Mayakovsky, and novelist Franz Kafka."
Okaaaay. Not too ambitious.
Jeremiah's blog is, how to say this without overstating the case? It's like a sniper's bullet. The prose is elegant, sharply worded, and always aimed at the hard and cruel heart of leftist American and European intellectuals--vile creatures our Jeremiah knows intimately. And of course, his sniper's scope is always trained on the Jihadists. As a former Marxist revolutionary, our Jeremiah is acutely familiar with tyranny in all its terrible incarnations.
Don't know why, but Jeremiah almost always ends up as: our Jeremiah.
Regarding the last California vote, when I queried our Jeremiah about casting his very first Republican ballot, his response was: "It was a hoot."
For years, my father was Rabbi of a small shul in Bensonhurst, Brooklyn. His loyal and incredibly forceful President was Mr. David Kinsberg, Z'L. Not more than five feet, three inches tall, Mr. Kinsberg loomed huge over my father's congregation. A passionate and opinionated man, our President had absolutely no qualms about wielding his power for the good of Israel and Torah--as he saw it.
When my father gave an Emergency Appeal for Israel and the wealthiest man in shul made his public pledge, Mr. Kinsberg could be heard sighing under his breath--extremely loudly: "You call that a pledge!?" And inevitably our wealthy congregant raised his pledge.
My father, after shul, invited Mr. Kinsberg to our home, ostensibly for a L'chaim, but really to take Mr. Kinsberg aside and gently suggest that maybe, just maybe publicly humiliating another congregnant was not exactly the correct thing to do.
And Mr. Kinsberg, with a big, infectious smile just slapped my father on the back and said: "Rabbi Avrech, that cheap so-and-so wouldn't give a dime if we didn't do what we do in public. Tell you the truth, for Eretz Yisroel I'd humiliate the so-and-so in Times Square!"
So-and-so. This is not some modest effort to cloak foul language. It is the language Mr. Kinsberg used when he wanted to use foul language.
Anyway, my father smiled. He just couldn't help it. He adored Mr. Kinsberg. He loved his President. To me he said, on more than one occasion: "I'm a lucky Rabbi to have such a congregational President."
And to me Mr. Kinsberg said: "Robert, do you know how lucky this shul is to have your father as a Rav? I 'm probably the only person in this shul with brains enough to realize what a gadol your father is."
And so, it was something of a pleasant and unexpected shock when I started reading comments signed by one: Ari Kinsberg. The writing was passionate, powerful and, well, opinionated; always brimming with Torah and an incredible love of Eretz Yisroel.
Could this Ari Kinsberg be related to...?
Deep in my gut, I knew the answer even before I wrote and posed the question.
Yes, this was David Kinsberg's grandson. My father's esteemed President's grandson had become a Seraphic Secret reader and commenter. And now Ari Kinsberg writes an absolutely dazzling blog, titled, oddly enough: Ari's Blog.
But listen Seraphic friends, and this is absolutely crucial: do not tell Mrs. Ari about Mr. Ari's Blog.
Mrs. Ari feels that Mr. Ari spends far too much time, as it is, reading blogs, and commenting on blogs, and Mrs. Ari does not want Mr. Ari to start his own blog. In fact, Mrs. Ari has a sneaking suspicion that if Mr. Ari is in charge of his very own web space Mrs. Ari and all their Little Aris will see even less of their beloved Mr. Ari.
And so, though I'm a great believer of honesty in marriage, of solid communication, all that good Dr. Phil stuff, I also feel it my civic and Zionist duty to support an absolutely top-notch blog.
So, if you happen to know Mrs. Ari, and if you happen to run into Mrs. Ari and if the conversation just happens to somehow be about blogging and bloggers, well, just, um... lie.
Yeah, that'll work.
I'm especially fond of Ari's Ratings system. Unfortunately, and quite inexplicably he has it posted at the very end of his blog so those coming without a photographic memory will be at a complete loss.
Memo to Ari: Post the Ratings Guidelines at the top of the blog, on your sidebar for instant reference. It's brilliant, why do you have it buried in no man's land?
Here they are:
Each post will be preceded by a "Rating Advisory" to warn readers concerning the nature of the post they will encounter.
B=Benign
C=Controversial
DYDPANC=Don't You Dare Post Any Negative Comments
P=Polemical
If you're a Seraphic Secret reader. If you're a Seraphic Secret reader and commenter. Or if you're just a Seraphic Secret lurker...
...think about starting your own blog. Think about that one chamber in your heart, that one corner of your mind that we should know about. It's uniquely yours, uniquely your own to share.
The blogosphere has changed the world, is changing the world, and the rules of discourse. No longer can Dan Rather lie and get away with it. No longer can The NY Times commit sedition and easily skate past it. No longer can Presbyterian church antiSemites bully their membership into divesting from Israel. All this and more are the battleground that the blogosphere is fighting -- and winning.
It's also a place where I can etch in words the whacky narrative of How I Married Karen.
Karen and I wish you all a lovely and meaningful Shabbos.
Posted by Robert J. Avrech at July 7, 2006 08:38 AM
Comments
Seraphic Secret is private property, that's right, it's an extension of our home, and as such, Karen and I have instituted two Seraphic Rules and we ask commentors to act respectfully.
1. No profanity.2. No Israel bashing. We debate, we discuss, we are respectful. You know what Israel bashing is. The world is full of it. Seraphic Secret is one of the few places in the world that will not tolerate this form of anti-Semitism. That's it. Break either of these rules and you will be banned.
What a sunburst of a post. You're right: it's about "that one chamber in your heart." I'm proud to be in such company. (It's time to get cracking on that Kafka post I've been mulling for a while.)
Robert, should we call Dr. Phil? Maybe he'll ask you to appear on his show.
Posted by: Jeremiah at July 7, 2006 01:37 PM
Robert, my most recent post is an offbeat look and statement about the lack of comments on my blog. You know what, Robert? Your honorable mention and beautiful description of my blog make me say, "So what if I don't get comments -- on what I often think are terrific-ly funny or heartrending posts of mine. Your words above more than make up for it."
I stumbled onto your blog in October 2004, reading it religiously and then visiting others in your blogroll. And I thought, "Maybe I can do this too..." but I'm a little slow to put my feet in the water and only began mine in December 2004. Thus far, it has been a journey of discovery, as you've aptly said. I'm discovering so much about myself and the world around me.
I am awestruck by the QUALITY of writing I find out there in blogland; so many bloggers' posts should be put in print -- in books, in magazines, in journals. Their personal touch is their voice...and we hear each one of them loud and clear.
I am thrilled to be named in such esteemed company as Randi and Jeremiah, both wonderful bloggers and very animated people! (Jeremiah is a true poet--"What a sunburst of a post"--and Randi makes us laugh and cry, sometimes at the same time.)
Wishing you and your readers a good Shabbos and wonderful weekend.
Posted by: Pearl at July 7, 2006 02:51 PM
Robert,
Well, if I didn't know better, I might think this was a ploy to finally get me to purchase a gun.
But, I know better.
March of 2005, I read an article in the Jewish Journal, about "some author who had written a kid's book" with a clever name.
I was intrigued, went to your website, and began reading. I had my breath taken away, as I read how beautifully you had written about your grief over Ariel.
You were the very first blog I ever read. I had heard about this whole phenomenon, and thought it was absolutely bizarre that people would write "diaries" for all the world to read.
Then I read yours. I was blown away, that someone would be so honest about his feelings, and give others the opportunity to know it was okay to express the pain of a heart torn in two.
I quickly emailed a letter to you expressing how I felt about your writings, and told you about my my father's death.
You wrote me back immediately and generously, with a heartfelt response.
I started reading your blog, and couldn't stop. I made my first comment in June, 2005. Soon after, you realized that I lived here in L.A. and invited me to the Ariel Avrech lecture.
I set up my blog, just so I could comment on other's blogs. (June 2005). It would take me 6 more months to actually start writing. (December 2005).
You were my greatest inspiration for writing my blog (and of course, Mr. Cruisin and Pearl were my cheering section).
You kept encouraging me. You taught me about writing short paragraphs, for ease of reading. You told me to just keep writing, that I would get better and better.
Don't know if I've gotten better and better...but I know that I have reached down into my soul and found things that I had forgotten were there.
Many people say blogging is a waste of time. But I have read stories that make me laugh, cry, think, explore, and just plain "connect". How can that be a waste of time?
I suppose spending time watching American Idol is more meaningful? (well, of course it is). But A.I. aside...I love spending spare moments here and there, learning and laughing, sometimes even crying over the human stories that many are willing to share.
Thanks Robert, for introducing me to a fascinating world, that I would not have known had it not been for you.
Posted by: Cruisin-mom at July 7, 2006 03:28 PM
Jeremiah:
Your post on Kafka. Hmmmm. Convince me. College sure didn't. Believe it or not, he's one of the Big Boys who just bores me to tears.
I'd rather watch Dr. Phil. He makes me feel so good about myself.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.seraphicpress.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at July 7, 2006 05:37 PM
Pearl:
Funny thing about comments. I'll publish a post and I'll be certain that I'm going to be inundated with ferociously contrary comments.
Wrong.
Then I put up some nice and doofy chapter about "How I Married Karen" detailing how I once again made a complete fool of myself just glancing at her, I don't know, at her elbow in shul--and I'll get like a zillion comments, plus some truly frightening private e-mails from female prisoners in maximum security facilities in Oklahoma who want to know if I'm still married to Karen.
There's just no telling.
I love your blog and if you stopped publishing "Pearlies of Wisdom" the world would be considerably diminished.
P.S. If you really want to get more reader's comments just write a blog about what lousy Jews Reform Jews really are. Take it from me, that'll get you comments -- up the wazoo.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 7, 2006 05:47 PM
Randi:
Your writing has gotten better and better with each and every entry. Yours is a lovely and low-key chronicle of growing up in the Valley at a particular time in America in a very particular way.
I especially love the blog about you and your girlfriends at the spring-break motel, and how your girlfriends were silly enough to get undressed in front of the big picture window, forgetting that everyone outside can see inside.
Hubba-hubba.
The clever twist in the blog is: that Cruisin' Mom is sick with some mysterious stomach ailment and is confined to bed, hence the only girl not participating in this mistaken public striptease.
Uh-huh.
Sure.
We understand. You have children now. Neighbors.
Moving on.
Of course I'm trying to get you to buy a gun. I'm working on commission for Smith & Wesson. Screenwriting is just a clever cover.
Soon, I'll have you voting Republican. Don't fret, as Jeremiah says: "It's a hoot."
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 7, 2006 05:57 PM
In the last frantic minutes allow me to wish you all a good shabbos.
Posted by: Jack at July 7, 2006 07:15 PM
Very Exciting! I didn't realize all these Blog franchises sprung up from Seraphic Secret! Should I join the ranks, too? Should I? Hmn...
Posted by: Yael at July 8, 2006 07:38 PM
Robert,
As you know, my own blog was also inspired by Seraphic Secret. Just when I was trying to decide whether and how to write, Beth (of House of Joy) read the article you'd written about it in the Jewish Press, and suggested I try a blog. I'd heard of blogs only vaguely, and yours was the first I ever read.
Writing my blog for that year and a half was one of the most meaningful things I've ever done; it went a long way toward helping me deal with my enormous grief for Timora z"l. And as it did for you, blogging put me in touch with some wonderful people - especially you and Karen, Randi, and Pearl.
So I thank you for your inspiration, and for your friendship
Sara
Posted by: With Love at July 8, 2006 09:02 PM
Jack:
Just got your messsages, so: Shavua Tov.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 8, 2006 09:41 PM
Hi Robert. I got into blogging quite by accident, and I've found it to be a really creative outlet and a way of connecting with interesting people. I don't think there's another venue where you can write and get such immediate feedback. Glad you found your little (or maybe not so little) community to give you the support and chizuk you need.
MH
Posted by: mata hari at July 8, 2006 09:42 PM
Yael:
Definitely!
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 8, 2006 09:43 PM
Sara:
There are two blogs written by grief-stricken parents that are inspired by Seraphic Secret. Yours and "Moving On" http://glenh.blogspot.com/ written by my friend Glenn Holman. I plan on writng about these two blogs in a separate posting devoted to grief.
Thanks for your kind words, and once again for paying a shive call to Karen in NY.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 8, 2006 09:51 PM
Mata Hari:
How do you get into blogging "by accident?" Really curious.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 8, 2006 09:54 PM
read my post To Blog or Not to Blog
from Oct 2005
Posted by: mata hari at July 8, 2006 10:14 PM
Yael: give it a try...it will surprise you in ways you could not imagine.
Sara: It's great to see you here! I found your beautiful blog through Pearl, and feel so fortunate to have shared in your writings about Timmi. Your blog was brave, heartbreaking, and strengthening all at the same time. Thank you for all that you so courageously shared with us.
Posted by: cruisin-mom at July 8, 2006 10:47 PM
Shavu'ah tov,
Thanks for the kind works for my blog, and especially for my grandfather (about whom I hope to blog).
I was introduced relatively late to the blogosphere and yours was actually the first blog I encountered. I still refer to it as a template for a first-class blog.
I know I have to make the ratings more visible (and I should get a different name and make some other changes), but I am just trying to get the blog rolling before I fine tune the externals.
Posted by: Ari Kinsberg at July 9, 2006 12:13 AM
May I ask my fellow Seraphic Friends to point me in the "write" direction?
What resources do y'all reccommend? What is the best way to jump into blogging?
Posted by: Yael at July 9, 2006 04:08 AM
Yael, if I may humbly suggest:
--Continue to read various blogs; see what type of blog you identify most with, deciding if you want to do something similar
--Comment on various blogs; doing so helps you find a creative voice, too
--Blogs often develop with time; you might go into it, thinking you have a certain angle, but a different part of you takes over, and your "voice" changes. There is no "WRITE" or WRONG in blogging, but there is still a need to use discretion -- what you say and how you say it
--Do you want to blog anonymously or let the world know who you are and what you stand for?
--Be creative...if that's your style. Be cut-and-dried if you prefer that.
--List your blog on venues like www.jewishblogging.com and on jrants.com if they meet the qualifications -- you get readership that way, too.
--Do NOT ask people to blogroll you! Bloggers apparently HATE to be asked that.
--Remember: you don't have to JUMP into blogging...you can amble in. Consider it as your personal journal whose pages are wide-open for the world to read and for Internet sources to store in its vault (so what what you say...it's noted by Google or other sources for life!).
Good luck. Happy writing...
Posted by: Pearl at July 9, 2006 06:15 AM
Oops--that last bracketed bit should have said,
"so WATCH what you say"!
Posted by: Pearl at July 9, 2006 06:18 AM
Yael,
first of all, ALWAYS use "y'all", when addressing a large group of people...it's endearing!
Secondly, Pearl is right...start reading and commenting, then people begin to know who you are and your personality.
I, personally, was quite obnoxious about the whole thing, and was constantly asking people to come read me...in retrospect, probably not wise, because people really like to discover you on their own, and as Pearl said, don't like to be asked to blogroll someone else. (But, sometimes "relentless" pays off...I even got Jack of Jack's Shack to finally blogroll me...no easy feat...right, Jack?)
Pearl is right about "how" do you want to blog, openly or anonymously. I blog anonymously, but I would say that people still have a good sense of who I am as a person. I do not give details of work, or exactly where I live, family names, etc...but share alot about how I grew up, or stories of the present that I think others might see themselves in.
My style is to take a life event and somehow turn it into a story of sorts. (but that's just me)
Others write about their daily lives. Others, pick one topic to focus on ie., the raising of their child. Once you start reading other blogs, you will soon discover what you are meant to do.
Hang in there, even when you don't get many comments. Doesn't mean people aren't reading...go back to Robert's archives and notice that in the beginning his comments were few...I don't think we can make that same statement now!
Good luck, have fun, find your inner author, write for you, and for no one else...then it will ring TRUE. Keep your paragraphs short for ease of reading (some professional writer guy told me that...but he'll try and sell you a gun too, so look out for him)
Pearl has layed it out beautifully...I just couldn't help but add my 2 and a half cents.
Posted by: Cruisin-mom at July 9, 2006 06:44 AM
Yael,
I sampled different blogs for 2 years - impressed and somewhat inspired - but never seriously imagined I'd start one. The above advice is golden. Yes, comment in other blogs and find your "inner author."
Ari,
Thanks to this post, I saw your blog for the first time. Very substantive, you have so much knowledge to impart. I will return.
Robert,
As for Kafka, he's a darling among the academic Left, which leaves me sad.
He led an astonishing, if unenviable, life (of the mind). I've always hoped it would offer clues into the prides and prejudices among assimilated Jewry which is mainly what I inherited about the religion from my family: Jews who are too smart, too wordly, and (in some cases) too wealthy for their own good.
To read him, I recommend starting with his diaries and short fiction, not his novels.
Posted by: Jeremiah at July 9, 2006 08:51 AM
Well, Robert, I guess I owe you a thank you: I discovered Cruisin' Mom & Pearl a few months ago, and through them (and a couple other blogs) I stumbled across Seraphic Secret. I still don't comment much, but I enjoy it immensely... and your "How I Met Karen" series helped me decide to write about how I met my own wife, Serach. This, in turn, may have been what caused another couple we know - the guy a good friend of your son-in-law who attended your daughter's wedding - to start writing their own story. I also had the pleasure of meeting Pearl recently on a trip to Toronto. So, again: Thank you.
Posted by: Ezzie at July 9, 2006 11:56 AM
Ezzie:
Well, now I have to catch up on how you met Serach. That sounds like fun. Glad that this little blog can inspire so many others to sing the praises of their wives. You are very welcome.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 9, 2006 02:34 PM
Ari:
Very kind of you to refer to my blog as the template for a first-class blog. Your blog is well on its way. I look forward to reading your article about your grandfather AH.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 9, 2006 02:41 PM
Thanks. Not just sing the praises, but record for posterity. A blog, because of the comments/questions people ask, helps us recall the little details that time would make us forget...
Posted by: Ezzie at July 9, 2006 10:20 PM
I even got Jack of Jack's Shack to finally blogroll me...no easy feat...right, Jack?)
Money talks. ;) Don't get used to it. That place is on its last legs and it is not clear if anything can save it.
Posted by: Jack at July 9, 2006 10:56 PM
Jack, I hope you don't mean you are thinking of shutting down "the shack".
Posted by: Cruisin-mom at July 10, 2006 07:18 AM
This remains to be seen.
Posted by: Jack at July 10, 2006 12:45 PM
Did someone mention KAFKA? I'm all ears! As for me, I've had my blog long before I came here... but this blog is SUCH a cozy, comfortable endearing place!
Just had to say it.
That's all. : )
Posted by: Irina at July 11, 2006 02:25 PM
Irina:
Jeremiah mentioned Kafka. I confess that I place Franz on the same shelf as Fyodor and Leo.
Sigh.
BTW, great post you wrote today about the protest at the Syrian embassy.
And thanks so much for the wonderful compliment.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at July 11, 2006 02:32 PM