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January 23, 2007
High School Confidential
I dropped out of high school because of Karen.
That's right.
Could not take being in the same school.
Seeing the lovely Karen Singer day after day for four long years, was more than I could bear. I'd been doing it since 4th grade in Flatbush elementary school, and let me tell you, by the time I was 14-years-old I was plum worn out.
In the hallways, in the lunchroom, in assembly, gee willikers, even firedrill, seeing her float--that's right Karen floated through the hallways, like a little Jewish Geisha--was more than I could tolerate. Day by day she was growing more beautiful, ever more popular. And I was growing, well, what's to say? I was just a skinny dork, an uber-dork who read, no devoured, Superman comic books; a miserable, lonely kid who hungered for the love of a girl who did not know that I was alive, and whom I was convinced would never know, much less care. We existed in and on separate spheres.
Hence, How I Married Karen, Chapter 32, running in Virtual Jerusalem this week.
Click here to read.
This is perhaps the most embarrassing chapter ever.
See me beg my poor confused father to let me drop out of Yeshiva Flatbush High School, presumably a really good yeshiva, to attend Brooklyn Talmudical Academy, known to be the most frightening Yeshiva on planet Brooklyn. Heck, even the hoods from Erasmus High, which was right next door to BTA, were intimitaded by some of the BTA wild boys.
Yes, it had come to that for yours truly.
Posted by Robert J. Avrech at January 23, 2007 03:46 PM
Comments
Seraphic Secret is private property, that's right, it's an extension of our home, and as such, Karen and I have instituted two Seraphic Rules and we ask commentors to act respectfully.
1. No profanity.2. No Israel bashing. We debate, we discuss, we are respectful. You know what Israel bashing is. The world is full of it. Seraphic Secret is one of the few places in the world that will not tolerate this form of anti-Semitism. That's it. Break either of these rules and you will be banned.
Oh...
I didn't know boys could be so emotional and tenderhearted!
Posted by: Joannah at January 23, 2007 06:41 PM
Joannah:
Karen says I lack some basic "filters" hence I'm an emotional target.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.seraphicpress.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at January 23, 2007 07:07 PM
Do you feel more deeply for others as well? Are you more empathetic than most? I think sometimes it goes along with being a creative/observer/writer type. It's both a curse and a blessing.
Posted by: mata hari at January 24, 2007 01:41 AM
I was thrilled to stop by and see this installment of "How I Married Karen." I must admit, your writing about your love for your wife and your misadventures along the way is what hooked me to your blog. In today's society, it seems that stories such as yours are fewer and farther between.
Again, Robert, your writing is such a pleasure. Thank you.
Posted by: Melissa at January 24, 2007 05:04 AM
Mata Hari:
I don't know if I feel more deeply than others, but I tend to empathize very deeply and imagine what others are feeling to an almost lunatic degree. It does help as a writer.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at January 24, 2007 09:01 AM
Melissa:
"Misadventures." Now that's a politic way of describing most of my life before I married Karen. Bless you.
Anywhoo, thanks so much for your kind words.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at January 24, 2007 09:04 AM
Robert - I'm the same. It's when you have a good imagination that you can put yourself in someone else's shoes.
Posted by: mata hari at January 24, 2007 09:46 AM
"It does help as a writer." (your comment to Mata Hari)
And it definitely is very telling of a person, if he/she is an empathetic soul. We need less ego and more empathy in this world!
Posted by: Pearl at January 24, 2007 10:06 AM
I remember that chapter very well, as I believe I remember most of the others. I don't have a favorite - I loved them all!
Posted by: Sara at January 24, 2007 12:02 PM
Mata Hari:
Not helpful... with roadkill :)
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at January 24, 2007 02:02 PM
Pearl:
Is it possible to have a boatload of ego plus another boatload of empathy?
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at January 24, 2007 02:23 PM
Sara:
Very kind of you. Tell me, did you ever print out "How I Married Karen" and show it to the children? Remember, when we had Shabbos dinner with you and your kids; a few (female, natch) expressed strong interest in reading it.
You know, I just had a thought: The Hebrew translation.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at January 24, 2007 02:28 PM
Wallah, I'd forgotten; you just reminded me. I'll take a survey of who wants to read it (in English) and make sure they get it!
Hebrew translation sounds like a good idea, though the question is always the cultural rather than the language translation. Maybe you could approach an Israeli weekly and if they think an Israeli audience would go for it they'll do the translation.
Posted by: Sara at January 25, 2007 06:57 AM
So, the big question which I am sure all of us are wondering is:
when did you actually tell Karen about the multi-decade deification you had with her?!
I am really interested in that- because when you read the articles it does trend pretty close to the "obsessed" line.
Which we all know in your case was b'sheret- but I would imagine many women in the country would be totally FREAKED OUT if they knew some guy was in love with them for 15 years without ever really talking to them. I know if I went up to Aliza Epstein and told her that I haven't stopped thinking about her for a month- I would have a restraint order brought up against me!! :)
Posted by: Lt. J. Fishman at January 25, 2007 09:52 AM
Lt. Fishman:
Good question. And believe me, I was no dope. I told Karen. And here is the chapter. "Alone in Yichud."
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at January 25, 2007 02:00 PM