"Why Jane rejected Bigg-Wither's proposal are pure theory. If Jane wrote any letters explaining her choice, they were destroyed."

Call me crazy, but something tells me that Jane didn't reject Bigg-Wither's proposal because of what she learned while doing the "Rate Your Mate" quiz in Cosmo Magazine.

Jake:

Fem Lit-crits are in love with the notion that Jane turned him down because playing mistress to his manor would have left little time for her novel writing.

This, to me, is projecting modern notions on Jane.

I figure your Cosmo theory has as much validity as the Fem lit critters.

My reading of her comments makes the answer to the whole question a very easy one: she didn't love him. Maybe I'm too harsh, but that message comes through loud and clear to me.

Jake:

Yup, the P'shat is usually the best answer. I happen to agree. You should see all the theories spun about Bigg-Withers being "repulsive and disgusting." There is no evidence for this at all. Oh yes, he had a slight stutter. To me, this sounds endearing.

Basically, I hated lit classes in college.

You obviously didn't go to lit classes with the proper goals in mind: getting hot dates. This is where being in love with Karen while she was at another school put you at a distinct disadvantage.

Jake:

How true. I was too geeky and besides, the girls, um 'scuse me, the women, were all reading 'The Second Sex,' and like militantly angry and I was like: I think I'll go watch "The Seven Samurai" where men are men and women really appreciate a good evisceration.

Robert, I love your Jane Austen blog entries! I have off and on over the years (having worked in the technology industry since 1985) read various forums for scholars, fans, and students of her work, but they all get under my skin for various reasons. Like many (maybe most) Jane Austen readers, I feel I alone have special insight into her work, and all the asinine comments and fights bore me silly. But your blog entries offer a fresh view and nearly always discuss something I was unaware of. Thanks so much for this!

Amy:

Thanks so much. I don't claim to have any special insights into Jane Austen's work I'm not a literary scholar, and I keep away from fashionable literary theories. I just love Jane Austen's work and consider her novels to be a fine mirror to male/female relationships—of any time and place. Hence her work is intensely moving and timeless.

Enjoyed reading your post Robert. I'm also so over the Fem/Lit Critic's reasoning's for passing up on my fourth great grandfather. Yes I'm descended from HBW via his youngest son Charles.

HBW wasn't an ogre or without qualities, the engagement just wasn't to be. His elder sisters played a large part in him asking the question of JA. A case of trying to kill two birds with one stone.

Personally - I'm glad JA said no - wouldn't be here otherwise.

Dear BM Rogers:

Thanks so much for writing. As I was researching Austen and Bigg-Wither's relationship, I was struck by some of the downright cruelty of what I read by the post modern lit-critters. What was it based on? Fashionable gender politics.

Your ancestor, seems to me, to have been a generous, decent and good man who, to his credit, was willing to marry a woman with no money, and no title--and let us recognize that at that time and that place, this reveals a stunning and incandescent personality, almost, dare I say it, a modern-thinker. He also recognized, naturally, a superior and talented woman.

In short, your ancestor, was clearly a British gentleman in the very best sense of the word.

We wish you and your fine family all the best.

Robert,

That's alright - I'm just a lone defender of Harris Bigg-Wither out on the internet!

Yes there certainly are some rather cruel and over the top descriptions of HBW. Fashionable gender politics certainly has a part to play. A lot of it is based on conjecture and speculation.

That certainly is an interesting point of view on your take of HBW. Arranged marriages were still very much the order of the day in 1802. Following the dis-engagement by JA, HBW's eventual marriage to Anne Howe Frith was arranged through an Uncle on his Mother's side of the family.

The descendants of Harris Bigg-Wither and Anne How e Frith are spread around the globe, and we stay in touch via our website http://www.bigg-wither.com (Shameless plug)

We appreciate and pay homage to our ancestors, and defend them where necessary.

All the best.

BMR

Hi Again,

Actually just found this webpage which does cast a very positive light on HBW.

http://home.vicnet.net.au/~pioneers/pppg5cf.htm

Showing mercy to those that had "feloniously stolen" from him.

BMR

BM Rogers:

Thanks so much for staying in touch and for the links. You should defend your family against cruel and baseless attacks. I suspect that much of the bile comes from the anti-title (is that the right term) fashion that seems to have swept the British people, and of course American leftist lit-crits. They basically have no lives outside of being bitter and mean to, well, everybody.