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April 03, 2008
The Son of Stranger Among Us
Lee Richardson as The Rebbe in A Stranger Among Us, 1992.
“Excuse me sir, I was wondering if you would mind changing your seat?”
“Um, what's the problem?”
The flight attendant glances nervously over her shoulder. I follow her gaze to a rather beautiful young woman who just might qualify as a contestant for America's Next Top Model.
The flight attendant wants me to sit next to Heidi Klum II.
No problemo. I'm all about cooperation, and as the man says: Can't we all just get along.
“The gentleman says that he'd prefer not to sit next to a woman, so I was wondering if perhaps you'd help us out and...”
Now I see him, the Hasidic man sitting next to the Heidi Klum II. He's all scrunched up in his seat, looking at me with pleading moo-cow eyes, begging me to rescue him from this totally untznius, immodest, situation.
Here's the thing: I'm not even wearing my yarmulke.
On my head is my Seraphic Press baseball cap so I'm not out as a fellow Jew, certainly no one has a hint that I'm a sympathetic Orthodox Jew.
Okay, it's official: the Seraphic cap is, um, Seraphic.
There are worlds within worlds.
The flight attendant practically plants one on me when I agree to switch seats. I feel like reassuring her that our Hasidic friend is harmless. He will not riot, will not set cars on fire, will not denounce American Airlines as a Jew-hating corporation. If he does not get his way—he'll cope. In short: he's Jewish not Muslim.
Heidi Klum II brushes past me and breathes: “Thanks much.”
Wow, totally Tyra ready, for not only is she beautiful but gramatically challenged.
My Hasidic friend looks up at me, smiles and says: “Thank you. You are very kind. You see—”
I cannot resist the moment. I'm totally Clark Kent revealing his identity as Superman.
“I understand, tznius.”
Mia Sara as the modest Hasidic Leah in A Stranger Among Us,
screenplay by yours truly.
A huge smile lights up my Hasidic friend's face.
After take-off, we exchange names, play a bit of Jewish geography, determine that we are not related—amazing—and then David (not his real name) asks me what I do for a living.
“I'm a writer.”
“You write, what, novels, newspaper stories, technical manuals of some sort?”
“Movies.” I confess, barely a whisper.
“Hollywood movies?” I think David now wishes he was sitting with Heidi Klum II.
I nod. Just once, hoping to skate past this rather inconvenient profession.
David narrows his hazel eyes. Thoughtfully twirls his thick, slinky peyes.
At this point I expect The Lecture. How can an Orthodox Jew, in good conscience, write such dreck, waste, be involved in spreading such notorious ideas and images.
“I was in a movie,” David dead-pans.
“Something from work, an industrial film?”
“No, no. A big Hollywood movie. I was an extra.”
"Shut-up.”
“I wouldn't tell just anybody.”
"Your secret's safe with me. What film?”
“It's called A Stranger Among Us. Have you ever heard of it?”
As I said: There are worlds within worlds.
“I wrote and produced A Stranger Among Us.”
David does a silent movie double take. He's like a Hasidic Harold Lloyd.
“No.”
“Yes.”
I could say “no” again and David could say “yes” but sheesh, that's a complete waste of precious dialog.
Eric Thal as Ariel and Melanie Griffith as Emily Eden, A Stranger Among Us.
“You know, we met on the set. I heard that the writer was a frum Jew and I just couldn't believe it and I asked around and I came over to you and thanked you for providing kosher food for all the Hasidic extras and you were very nice and asked me if were were being treated properly by the assistant directors.”
I shrug, I have absolutely no recollection.
David explains: “That time in my life was very difficult. Finances and bills, we didn't know how we were going to pay the rent that month, that's how bad it was. And then I heard about this Hollywood movie that needed extras and was paying good money for real Hasidim. But you can imagine what the community thought about such a thing. But my wife said, do it, no one will know, we need the money. And do you know how many other Hasidim had the exact same idea? We all met in the casting office and we all were so ashamed to look at each other, but in the end, the money was too good, and we were treated well and all the halachos were followed by production people, so we knew that somebody important knew what was what.”
”Did you ever see the finished film?”
"Yes, my wife and I rented it and watched it on a monitor after it came out on video.”
There's a long, awkward pause. I know what comes next. I've heard it before.
“I have to tell you that when, what was the boy's name, the Rebbe's son?”
“Ariel. The actor was Eric Thal.
“Ariel, right. I have to tell you, and no disrespect intended, but when he kisses the girl, what's the actress?”
“When Ariel kisses the Melanie Griffith woman, I did not think this was necessary. Did you have to do that?”
“Yup. It adds conflict. It's forbidden romance. Classic stuff. And look, in the end, Ariel marries the Rebbe's daughter, who is played by Rena Sofer, the great, great, great, great grand daughter of the Chatam Sofer.”
“Really? Really and truly? Amazing. I only saw her from afar, but oy, such an eidel kallah. And the chuppah, that was authentic and beautiful, the singing and everything. It was all fine except for the kiss. Oh, and when Ariel explains to her about the Kabbalah and sex. That would never happen.”
“I know. That was just a bit of screwball comedy. I was playing it like Cary Grant and Irene Dunne.”
David has no idea what I'm talking about.
“It's true, the scene is highly unlikely in real life, but this is a movie and motion pictures are exactly like real life—except I rewrite the boring parts.”
After we land, and as we step off the plane, David says: “Twice you have helped me, all those years ago when you gave me the job on your movie and now when you sat next to me. I wish there was something I could do for you.”
“There is.”
This Shabbos, in a Hasidic shtibl, synagogue, my Hasidic friend will make a b'racha, a blessing, over our new granddaughter, Maayan Ariel.
Eric Thal embraces Mia Sara, A Stranger Among Us, 1992
For a nice companion piece to this story, see Seraphic Secret's amazing encounter in a Apple Store: Shut-up! Shut-up! Shut-up!
Posted by Robert J. Avrech at April 3, 2008 10:11 AM
Comments
Seraphic Secret is private property, that's right, it's an extension of our home, and as such, Karen and I have instituted two Seraphic Rules and we ask commentors to act respectfully.
1. No profanity.2. No Israel bashing. We debate, we discuss, we are respectful. You know what Israel bashing is. The world is full of it. Seraphic Secret is one of the few places in the world that will not tolerate this form of anti-Semitism. That's it. Break either of these rules and you will be banned.
What a beautiful story, Robert. Beshert, beshert, beshert.
Consider it a long-overdue postscript to your film.
Posted by: Pearl at April 3, 2008 12:43 PM
Absolutely amazing.
Posted by: ralphie at April 3, 2008 12:51 PM
Hilarious!
But I think a guy who could be in a movie could sit next to the woman. I'm not a big fan of this stirring up a fuss.
Posted by: kishke at April 3, 2008 12:55 PM
What a great story. It's amazing how someone can so appreciate a small act of kindness that you can barely remember years later. This Hassid sounds like a good man, and I hope he gives your new granddaughter a wonderful bracha.
Posted by: Raizy at April 3, 2008 01:29 PM
Once heard a joke that in Europe, if you wanted to go to a movie, the best time to go was Yom Kippur at night...because, you know, everyone else would be in shul. Only problem was, everyone had the same idea. Reminds me of the Chasid being an extra in the film and meeting the other Chassidim.
But actually, now that he mentions it (re the kiss and the forbidden conversation) - I also have a problem with movies and shows including scenes with Orthodox Jews that wouldn't happen in real life. I feel it's not authentic, and that most people watching won't realize it.
Posted by: mata hari at April 3, 2008 01:38 PM
Very cool. Small world. Interesting that he had no problem with YOU sitting next to the bombshell.
Posted by: psychotoddler at April 3, 2008 01:39 PM
my Hasidic friend will make a b'racha, a blessing, over our new granddaughter
She's okay, isn't she?
Posted by: Alterbentzion at April 3, 2008 01:41 PM
According the Rambam, the highest form of Tzedakah.
And Rena Sofer was also Jack's sister-in-law on 24.
Posted by: soccerdad ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.seraphicpress.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at April 3, 2008 02:23 PM
Um, Psychotoddler, may I point out that despite our host's fantasy, he ended up sitting next to the Chasid, and HKII moved to sit in his old seat. The usual Keystone Kops kerfuffle.
Posted by: Barzilai at April 3, 2008 02:43 PM
Thanks for sharing your it's a small world story.Thanks as well for your enlightening website as I do enjoy reading your site. It's one of my daily must reads.
Posted by: Tamster at April 3, 2008 03:06 PM
I don't know how I missed the fact that you have a new granddaughter, but (belated) MAZEL TOV!!! She is absolutely beautiful.
Posted by: Fern R at April 3, 2008 03:14 PM
Very cool story, and loved the "worlds within worlds"...and your granddaughter's name is beautiful.
I barely had time to glance at my computer today, but caught this on a cool, dreary and rainy day, but this gave it some light and happiness.
Thanks Robert.
Posted by: Maurice at April 3, 2008 04:20 PM
i heard that there is a new Hassidic Love Story
with a 'real' Hasidic actor and Natalie Portman,
(New York, I Love You)
but that the Hasid walked off the set when the script called for them to hold hands ...
any news/updates/thoughts on this?
(btw,
NP looks 'great' in a tznius outfit and Tichel ;-)
click on the movie pics on site)
Posted by: exdemexlib at April 3, 2008 04:42 PM
exdem: He didn't walk off b/c of holding hands; they accommodated him on that. What happened was that they heard about it in Williamsburg and forced him to back out.
Posted by: kishke at April 3, 2008 05:10 PM
Some stories make me laugh and cry at the same time. Like this one.
Posted by: Jeremiah at April 3, 2008 06:18 PM
Pearl:
Bashert, indeed.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 3, 2008 07:44 PM
Ralphie:
Just another day in the life of Seraphic Secret.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 3, 2008 07:45 PM
Kishke:
He stirred up a minor fuss.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 3, 2008 07:47 PM
Robert, this is just as great as the Mac Store story. Wonderful! (and you watch America's Next Top Model, eh?)
Posted by: cruisin-mom at April 3, 2008 08:18 PM
Once heard a joke that in Europe, if you wanted to go to a movie, the best time to go was Yom Kippur at night...because, you know, everyone else would be in shul.
I tried using that theory with Disneyland. I have been there on Easter and Xmas only to find that the place was more crowded than usual.
On a side note I see Rena Sofer in shul and it takes great effort not ask her questions about the upcoming season of 24.
Posted by: Jack at April 3, 2008 08:34 PM
You have the most amazing stories!
Posted by: Irina at April 3, 2008 09:12 PM
Raizy:
I'm sure the b'racha will be lovely. My Hasidic buddy owes me:)
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:10 AM
Mata Hari:
I think I do a pretty good job of presenting Orthodoxy within the confines of the Hollywood factory.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:13 AM
Psycho:
Heidi II moved to my seat which was in another row entirely. Some other lucky slob was grinning for five hours.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:16 AM
Alter:
Maayan Ariel is B'H fine. This will be a general b'racha for the mother and child at the Torah.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:20 AM
Soccer Dad:
Well, yeah, the Rambam was a Republican. The highest form of tzedakah is providing a job so a man can support himself and his family, rather than take hand-outs which foster dependancy, which is what the Democrats are all about.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:24 AM
Barzilai:
Correct.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:25 AM
Tamster:
Glad you enjoy Seraphic Secret. Do keep in touch with us.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:27 AM
Fern:
Thanks so much for the mazal tov on our new granddaughter, Maayan Ariel. We are very happy.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:28 AM
Maurice:
We're so glad that Seraphic Secret and Maayan Ariel are capable of bringing light to your overcast day.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:31 AM
Exdem:
The Hasidic love story is just one of an anthology of 12 love stories in the film.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:33 AM
Jeremiah:
Laughing through your tears.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 12:34 AM
quite a bit I didn't really understand in this post but a great story nonetheless.
Posted by: thud at April 4, 2008 03:38 AM
I heard a rumor that the "Hassidic" extras in "The Chosen" were not all Jewish and they caused a stir in Brooklyn when they went to Burger King or some such place in-costume during the breaks in shooting. Again, I'm not sure if that's true, but perhaps that played a role in the decision to use real Hassidim in "Stranger?"
Posted by: Jake at April 4, 2008 03:53 AM
Get right out of town! Great story.
It needed a little kissing. Come on now. Eric Thal was way too foxy for no kissing. Hubba hubba.
I really enjoyed the movie, especially the ending.
Posted by: Alice at April 4, 2008 11:29 AM
Cruisin' Mom:
As this was unfolding I was thinking, Mac store blog: "Shut-up! Shut-up! Shut-up!"
I definitely deserve some babke, no?
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 4, 2008 05:49 PM
Robert....you deserve two...and with chocolate chips...loved this story, and love how you spruced it up with the pictures.
Posted by: cruisin-mom at April 4, 2008 07:19 PM
Robert,
What wonderful news about your new gorgeous baby granddaughter, Maayan Ariel (and what an equally beautiful name!). May she be a source of happiness for your family always!
What an amazing retelling of your chance meeting on the plane. It makes me realize how small (and cozy) our Jewish world can be.....
Mazal tov again...awesome awesome news!!!
Rachel :)
Posted by: Rachel at April 5, 2008 10:44 PM
Fascinating, absolutely fascinating! I love Hollywood trivia and tidbits so I thoroughly enjoyed that post. I had no idea that Rena Sofer is a descendant of the Chatam Sofer. Very interesting.
And may I just say that I really liked that movie-I didn't know you had anything to do with it.
Posted by: RR at April 6, 2008 06:48 AM
Robert:
A beautiful and touching story.
Shavuah Tov.
Mark
Posted by: Mark at April 6, 2008 06:59 AM
Jake:
Rumor is not true. We knew from the beginning that for the film to really work we needed real Hasidim. Besides, wardrobe and makeup could never have done a credible job on outfitting that many Hasidim. The Chosen was never mentioned in one production conference.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:35 AM
Alice:
I was glad that I kept the scene to kissing. You should have heard the story conferences where the studio execs wanted them to sleep together. We had heated battles over this issue. Thankfully, the director, Sidney Lumet, backed me up all the way.
Glad you like the film.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:38 AM
Rachel:
Thanks for the mazal tov. Yes, the Jewish world can seem like a large extended family at times.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:41 AM
RR:
Rena's a lovely young woman. Stranger was her first job in motion pictures.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:43 AM
Thud:
Sorry about all the Hebrew and Yiddish. I'll try and translate from now on.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:44 AM
Mark:
Thanks so much. Usually my flights are incredibly boring.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:46 AM
Because I grew up in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I have always been interested in movies (both of 'em) that featured chasidim. The chasidim in your movie were definitely more authentic than those in "The Chosen". But the chasidic way of life is so unique and isolated that I think it's probably close to impossible to protray it totally realistically.
The one recent exception that comes to mind is "Ushpizin", the Israeli film whose two stars are married in real life and play a married Breslov (I think) couple in the movie. They never once show any physical attraction to each other and never even touch casually. And the movie was riveting.
Posted by: Baila at April 6, 2008 01:16 PM
And I remember Rena Sofer from her General Hospital days. If I remember correctly, she went to Frisch High School, and we all knew somone who knew her.
Posted by: Baila at April 6, 2008 01:18 PM
Baila:
I think Ushpizin is a wonderful film. I reviewed it here and said it was the best film ever made in the State of Israel.
Here's my post:
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 01:33 PM
"He will not riot"
don't be so sure: http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/972147.html
you know, i actually answered an adv. in a jewish newspaper to play an extra in the movie. a friend and i went to some office in the city, but they weren't interested once we told them we don't have traditional hasidic garb at home. at the time i thought they were crazy for actually expecting real hasidim to answer the adv., but i guess your friend did. i still can't believe your movie cast real hasidim.
Posted by: Lion of Zion at April 6, 2008 08:47 PM
Lion:
Idiots.
We actually cast hundreds of Hasidim for the wedding scene, and dozens of Hasidim for other scenes. We offered glatt kosher food, were willing to hire entire families, and paid really good wages. We just asked that everyone supply their own wardrobes.
Which supplied the authenticity we were seeking.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 6, 2008 10:55 PM
Went back and read your review of "Ushpizim"; of course, it was spot-on.
Here's a random little Hebrew language fact to file away: in Hebrew the word "hospitalize" is from the same root word as "Ushpizim" (which as you know means "holy guest" in Aramaic). The word is "לאשפז" (LeAshpez). If a male is hospitalized you say he is "מאושפז"--"mehooshpaz".
Ulpan is totally cool.
Posted by: Baila at April 7, 2008 06:00 AM
Went back and read your review of "Ushpizim"; of course, it was spot-on.
Here's a random little Hebrew language fact to file away: in Hebrew the word "hospitalize" is from the same root word as "Ushpizim" (which as you know means "holy guest" in Aramaic). The word is "לאשפז" (LeAshpez). If a male is hospitalized you say he is "מאושפז"--"mehooshpaz".
Ulpan is totally cool.
Posted by: Baila at April 7, 2008 06:01 AM
Baila:
Thanks so much for the private Ulpan. Awesome.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at April 7, 2008 09:24 AM
Loved "Stranger Among Us"! Saw it at a difficult time in my life. It meant a lot to me and became a turning point for me. Not long afterwards I found my true Beshert. My husband and I had the word engraved in our wedding bands and it has become an intemate pet name we use with each other when we are alone. Thank you for a lovely story!
Posted by: Kelly at June 7, 2008 05:20 PM
Kelly:
Thanks so much for letting me know how much the film meant to you. I've received several dozen letters over the years from people who have, like you, been profoundly affected by the movie.
It's the reason I love making movies.
Please stay in touch and let us know how you're doing.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech at June 7, 2008 09:45 PM