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September 25, 2009
Before Yom Kippur...
Before every major Jewish holiday, Karen and I visit our son, Ariel's ZT'L, grave.
Yom Kippur begins Sunday night and so, in advance of this most holy of days, we made sure to set aside time and drive to the cemetery in Simi Valley, about forty minutes from our home in Los Angeles.
The afternoon was so hot—over 100 degrees—that Ariel's granite headstone burned to the touch. I worried that the blinding heat was just too much for our son.
That's what happens to my mind, my sense of reason, when caught in the whirlwind of this unfathomable loss.
After reciting Psalms, Karen and I placed two stones on Ariel's headstone, an ancient Jewish tradition indicating visitors at the grave.
The Hebrew inscription reads:
“Avrech, a father in wisdom, but young in years.”
(In Hebrew Av means father, and Rach means tender or young.)
He endeavored and labored in the study of Torah.
He was conscientious in the observance of the Mitzvot.
His heart was filled with the love of life and the fear of G-d.
Karen and I wish all our friends and relatives a profoundly spiritual Shabbat Shuvah, and a meaningful Yom Kippur.
May you all be sealed in the Book of Life for a good and sweet year.
Posted by Robert J. Avrech at September 25, 2009 08:02 AM
Comments
Seraphic Secret is private property, that's right, it's an extension of our home, and as such, Karen and I have instituted two Seraphic Rules and we ask commentors to act respectfully.
1. No profanity.2. No Israel bashing. We debate, we discuss, we are respectful. You know what Israel bashing is. The world is full of it. Seraphic Secret is one of the few places in the world that will not tolerate this form of anti-Semitism. That's it. Break either of these rules and you will be banned.
Robert and Karen,
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Posted by: DrCarol at September 25, 2009 08:35 AM
May you all be sealed in the Book of Life for a good and sweet year.
gam atah, Robert. Shanah Tovah.
Posted by: Kae Gregory at September 25, 2009 08:49 AM
Robert from what I have read of your son and by the questions he asked - he was wise far beyond his years.
Posted by: Bill Brandt at September 25, 2009 09:54 AM
An easy fast to all of the Avrechs both near and far.
Posted by: Jack at September 25, 2009 11:04 AM
I couldn't help but notice the shadow in the photo. And I recognize that a shadow will forever remain in your lives with the absence of your beloved Ariel, z"l.
May you all have a g'mar chatimah tovah. And may only good things find their way to Casa Avrech!
Posted by: Pearl at September 25, 2009 11:30 AM
As the years pass, it does not get any easier to observe your pain and loss. I am so sorry.
Posted by: Jackie at September 25, 2009 11:35 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss of Ariel. As a mother, I cannot imagine the depth of your pain. May Hashem give you comfort always....
May you and your entire family be sealed for a very sweet, happy New Year.
Posted by: Rachel at September 25, 2009 01:11 PM
Tears in my eyes when I read this post...So sorry for your loss.
Posted by: Jacob da Jew at September 25, 2009 01:41 PM
I think every day of my father and mother and they died 20 and 8 years ago respectively. And they lived to 77 and 87 years of age. To imagine losing one of my children at so young an age is impossible to fathom.
It is a lasting tribute to Ariel that you and Karen hold the lectures in his memory each year. Speaking as a gentile, the lectures and this blog are always informative and are decidedly better than getting one's knowledge of Judaism from Woody Allen movies.
Here's to knowing that Ariel's memory will always remain in you and your family's hearts.
Posted by: Johnny at September 25, 2009 03:24 PM
Dear Robert, I'm moved beyond words by your post. You'v always been so sincere about your values, your family, your points of view, your life...all this sincerity helps make Seraphic Press my favourite blog. I wish you, Karen, Offsprings #1 and #2 and all the family a Shanah Tovah Umetukah, a Gmar Chatimah Tovah and a Tzom Kal, Sheichie lekulchem Shana Mevorechet, a ziss yur, im refua shlemah, hatzlacha rabah veparnassah tovah! G-d bless you, have a wonderful 5770 - and Shabat Shalom!
Posted by: Flavio Calichman at September 25, 2009 05:08 PM
Everyone:
Karen and I are grateful for your kind and generous comments. We are continually heartened by the support of our readers. May you all be inscribed in the book of life for a happy and sweet year.
Good Shabbos.
Posted by: Robert J. Avrech ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.seraphicpress.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at September 25, 2009 05:48 PM
If you never write another word on this website, you will have said it all.
Posted by: Jeremiah at September 25, 2009 07:11 PM
Yehi zichro baruch.
Gemar chatimah tovah.
Posted by: Mrs. S. at September 26, 2009 10:27 AM
Thank you for your moving post about your son. Thank you for reminding us about what really matters and what does not - and to be grateful for every moment we have with those we love and treasure.
Best wishes to all in the New Year.
Posted by: Peg at September 26, 2009 01:11 PM
HaMakom Y'Nachem...
Gmar Chatima Tova
Posted by: Batya from Shiloh at September 26, 2009 08:42 PM
Robert - I always get a lump in my throat when I read of Ariel ZT'L.
My best to the entire Mispocha Avrech and a sincere wish that you all be inscribed in the Book of Life for a happy, healthy and prosperous 5770 - and that 5770 will be kind to Medinat Yisrael and the Am Yisrael.
Best from The Great White North.
Mark
Posted by: Mark at September 26, 2009 08:50 PM
Thoughts and Prayers for the Avrech family...
Joe
Posted by: ProphetJoe at September 28, 2009 06:58 AM
I'm so sorry...
Thinking of you, and wishing you a shana tova.
Posted by: Rahel at September 28, 2009 12:52 PM
Robert, I offer you the words of Isaiah that are shared by our faiths:
[quote]
The Spirit of the L-rd G-d is upon me; because the L-rd hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; He hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound;
To proclaim the acceptable year of the L-rd, and the day of vengeance of our G-d; to comfort all that mourn;
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the L-rd, that He might be glorified.
[/quote]
It is a precept of my faith to mourn with those that mourn. I have never lost a child and cannot pretend I know how you feel; nevertheless, I mourn with you.
Posted by: Kent G. Budge at September 28, 2009 01:27 PM
Ah gut yohr! May you see a nechamah with all of klal Yisrael.
Posted by: kishke at September 28, 2009 07:24 PM
Your blog made me cry and I think of you with compassion and understanding.
I was also worried that the sun would be too much for my son and planted a tree next to his grave so that he can have some shade. His name is Daniel and he died in the beginning of this year, 2 months short of his 4th birthday.
Best wishes for you and your family.
Alison
Posted by: Alison at September 30, 2009 12:10 PM