Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture

The Day After the Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture

June 12, 2006 by Robert J. Avrech 23 Comments

Here are Karen’s opening remark’s for the Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture. Afterwards Mrs. Rachel Friedman lectured brilliantly, and then Cantor Avshalom Katz lovingly chanted the “Kayl Malei Rachamim.” There was a lovely brunch where Seraphic friends met face to face for the first time. Karen and I want to thank everyone who attended, but especially Seraphic Secret friends who made such an effort and traveled, in some cases, so far, to attend and honor Ariel’s memory. Karen and I are deeply grateful for your generosity.

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Karen’s Opening Remarks

On Shavuous the Jews received the gift of the Torah, but I also received a private gift two weeks ago.
When you hear a new story about a loved one, it is almost like cheating death. You feel like time is moving forward for just an instant, because you have a fresh glimpse of this person. The new revelation, a snapshot of the person allows you to steal some extra time from the past, a life story you thought was sealed, now has a new chapter.

I received such a gift Erev Shavuous from one of Ariel’s oldest and dearest friends, Ari Miller. He told us a Shavuous story that is emblematic of Ariel. The boys of Yeshiva Gedolah had all stayed up all night for Tikun Lel Shavuot, The small group from this side of town decided it was worth it to walk back in the early morning craving the comfort of their own beds rather than crashing at friends for the entire holiday.

After walking four miles, as the boys neared the home stretch Ari recalls, “I was walking on auto pilot most of the way but the excitement of crawling into bed in a few minutes must have given me a second wind. As I neared the park bordering my house I became more awake. At that point I remember that Ariel was still giving divrei Torah and he probably had not stopped the entire way home.”

This was Ariel, always focused on Torah, never one to compartmentalize his life into the “fun” parts and the “Torah” parts. Everything was integrated and he never wasted a moment. When he left the house he tucked a sefer, under his arm, even for a five minute car trip.

One of Ariel’s friends told us that a la Charlie Brown, Ariel told him his definition of happiness. Here goes: Happiness, according to Ariel, was sitting in Bais Midrash struggling through a torturous sugyah, portion, of Gemara, Talmud, solving it, and then going out for a cool, tall, glass of water.

Ariel’s Kever, his grave, includes the phrase, Yagah V”amal B”Torah. He worked assiduously and with great effort at the study of Torah. We recently saw a movie where people envisioned Heaven. Jokingly one person said- It’s like when you want a Mountain Dew, you don’t even have to do anything to get it. You just think of it and you’re quenched.

Well, I don’t think that’s Ariel’s version of Gan Eden. I think he is still working and struggling at Torah. As to whether he is immediately quenched or he actually drinks that tall glass of cold water – I will have to see for myself. I do know that the best way we can honor him is to devote this day to learning Torah in his memory, and to walk that extra mile every day still talking Torah.

Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture

June 9, 2006 by Robert J. Avrech 22 Comments

Karen and I remind all our Seraphic friends that the the Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture takes place this coming:

Sunday, June 11, 2006.

The Young Israel of Century City
9317 West Pico Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90035
(310)273-6954

Time: 10:00 AM

The lecture is free.

The Avrech Family & Friends are honored to present as our guest lecturer:

Rachel Friedman

Mrs. Friedman is a world renowned scholar on The Five Books of Moses, and The Prophets.

The title of her lecture is: How Can We Come to Know G-d?

What does “knowledge” mean in the Bible? How do our ancestors come to “know” G-d in biblical times? In an age devoid of prophecy and open Divine revelation, how can each of us come to “know” G-d today?

Through an exploration of selected Torah texts as well as Midrashic and medieval commentaries, we will explore how the Torah defines and guides the relationship between G-d and human beings.

Mrs. Friedman was inspired to explore this topic by some of Ariel’s comments ZT’L in his article Bringing Purim Into Pesach on p. 113 of The Book of Ariel.

Rachel Friedman is Director of the Yesodot Foundations Program at the Drisha Institute for Jewish Education in New York City.

Rachel is lead author of Joshua of the Tanach Yomi , Daily Torah Study series published by AMIT. She also contributes to each of the Tanach Yomi volumes on the Five Books of Moses.

Rachel has taught Bible at the Frisch School and at the Ma’ayanot Women’s Adult Education Program in Northern New Jersey. She has also practiced law at major law firms including Weil Gotshal & Manges in New York City.

Rachel has an MA in Bible from the Bernard Revel Graduate School of Yeshiva University and a JD from Columbia University School of Law. She also did graduate work at the Columbia University School of International and Public Affairs.

A delicious brunch will follow the lecture.

We look forward to seeing many Seraphic friends at the lecture.

Karen and I wish everyone a lovely and meaningful Shabbos.

Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture

April 5, 2006 by Robert J. Avrech 35 Comments

Karen and I would like to invite all our Seraphic Friends to the Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture.

Sunday, June 11, 2006.

The Young Israel of Century City
9317 West Pico Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90035
(310)273-6954

Time: 10:00 AM

The lecture is free.

The Avrech Family & Friends are honored to present as our guest lecturer:

Rachel Friedman

Mrs. Friedman is a world renowned scholar on The Five Books of Moses, and The Prophets.

The title of her lecture is: How Can We Come to Know G-d?

Through an exploration of selected Torah texts as well as Midrashic and medieval commentaries, we will explore how the Torah defines and guides the relationship between G-d and human beings.

Mrs. Friedman was inspired to explore this topic by some of Ariel’s comments ZT’L in his article Bringing Purim Into Pesach on p. 113 of The Book of Ariel.

Rachel Friedman is Director of the Yesodot Foundations Program at the Drisha Institute for Jewish Education in New York City. She also coordinates the Tanach program for the Drisha Scholar’s Circle. Rachel is an instructor of Bible and exegesis and has taught in Drisha’s Continuing Education, Beit Midrash, Talmud/Tanach and Scholar’s Circle Program.

Rachel is lead author of Joshua of the Tanach Yomi , Daily Torah Study series published by AMIT. She also contributes to each of the Tanach Yomi volumes on the Five Books of Moses.

A delicious brunch follows the lecture. If you want a taste of Offspring #2’s wedding, well, we’re using the very same caterer.

Interpolation: a short tale of food, medicine and Shabbos.

When Ariel was in the hospital waiting for a lung transplant, a transplant that never happened, there was a fine young physician, J., who cared for Ariel on a daily basis, and who’s relationship with Ariel expanded well beyond the normal doctor/patient boundaries.

This young doctor was and is Shomer Shabbos, a Sabbath observer, but naturally he does not keep the Sabbath in the hospital for his duties as a physician, the commandment to preserve life comes first–as prescribed by Halacha, Jewish law.

Shabbos in the hospital: after the sun fell, after Ariel and I davened, prayed, I poured grape juice for Ariel, and as if by magic, J., the young physician appeared in Ariel’s room, and Ariel chanted the Kiddush, the blessing over the grape juice.
J. sank heavily into a visitor’s chair.
“Ahhh, Shabbos,” he sighed.

We sang Shabbos z’miros, songs, together, and then Ariel gave a short d’var Torah, a Torah thought, without preparation, just off the top of his head.

J. never failed to be astonished at Ariel’s iron fortitude. You see, our son was hooked up to, gosh, so many machines. He was not even breathing on his own. And yet, and yet, Ariel insisted on living his life as prescribed by the Torah and the Mesorah–without one complaint, without conceding any of the holy parts because the whole was so damaged. Ariel ignored the broken parts. Karen called it, “healthy denial.”

Once, in all seriousness, J. confided to me: “Ariel, your son, he might be, have you ever considered that he’s one of the Lamed Vovniks?”

This is not something we Orthodox Jews suggest to one another very often, or lightly. In fact, pious Jews almost never seriously consider this notion. And yet J. is a deeply serious man and there was not a flicker of irony in his eyes nor a hint of self consciouness.

And since then, several people, all G-d fearing and learned, have proposed the very same thought to me.

Which makes me tremble. For the more time that passes the more vividy does our son come into focus and yes, there was something otherworldly about our Ariel Chaim.

And if you’d like a peek into how a writer loots material, read my book The Hebrew Kid and the Apache Maiden, where you will discover a whole storyline about the Lamed Vovniks.

When Ariel was niftar, when Ariel’s soul left his body, and J. found out, it’s the only time I ever saw one of my son’s doctors weep. J. was at Ariel’s funeral. J paid a shiva call.

And J.’s father catered Offspring #2’s wedding and will be catering the Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture.

End Interpolation.

Attention Seraphic Secret University Students!

1. You will get extra credit for attending the lecture.
2. There will be a Seraphic Secret table reserved.
3. Bring your computers so you can communicate with one another if talking face-to-face proves too challenging.
4. No food fights.
5. Memo to Randi: No need to bring babake or coffee. Consider this your day off.

Karen and I can think of no more appropriate venue for meeting our Seraphic Friends. To us, you have extended great measures of comfort and generosity. We’d like to give something tangible back in return. The Third Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture would be a fine way indeed. And do keep in mind that by attending this lecture, you will be participating in the Mesorah. Yahrzeits have been observed since Talmudic times. It is a sign of reverance for the deceased. And yahrtzeit lectures, memorial lectures, are just as ancient.

Karen and I look forward to seeing you in a few weeks.

Second Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture

June 19, 2005 by Robert J. Avrech 15 Comments

Today was the Second Annual Ariel Avrech Memorial Lecture.

Rabbi David Fohrman used the story of Joseph and his brothers to explore the notion of forgiveness; The question he posed was whether forgiveness is possible when someone has done something absolutely horrible to you. How can you forgive an egregious injustice? He essentially proved that that by acknowledging the very imbalance in a relationship head-on, you can repair the damage but by denying the hurt you caused, or denying the pain you feel, the relationship never can recover. Rabbi Fohrman engaged the audience in a real Socratic give and take. As soon as I can I will set up a link so you can purchase this amazing talk directly from Rabbi Fohrman.

It was a bittersweet day for Karen and me. We distributed the Book of Ariel at the lecture. We met old friends, made new friends and silently celebrated our 28th anniversary.

I leave for Oakland tomorrow morning where I’ve been asked to deliver a talk about “The Hebrew Kid and the Apache Maiden” to the American Association of Jewish Librarians. When I return I will blog more about the lecture and post some pictures.

Karen adds: Ariel hand picked Rabbi Fohrman for us. He had attended his lectures and knowing our taste, passed on several of his tapes to us. He was right. I loved Rabbi Fohrman’s analysis of the Ten Commandmants and The Story of Adam and Eve.

Years passed. When the time came to choose a lecturer for this year I racked my brain to remember the name of the lecturer that Ariel told me about who also was a professor at Johns Hopkins. I went through his hundreds of tapes. This was a task I had avoided since his death. None of the tapes rang a bell. I used an old trick of going through the alphabet before I went to sleep, sort of counting sheep, hoping to toggle some circuit in the old memory bank. Nothing worked. Finally, one night I beseeched Ariel, saying, “Please, do your old mother a favor, tell me the name of the rabbi you liked so much, you know, the one with the sophisticated, but frum world view.”

Then it came to me. Coincidentally, that week, the name was confirmed. Rabbi Fohrman was writing a column in the Jewish Press, and his e-mail and all his contact information was now available to us.

Such was providence.

The lecture was a success and a wonderful tribute to Ariel. As we dropped Rabbi Fohrman off for his return flight I broke into tears thinking how much Ariel would have enjoyed getting closer to Rabbi Fohrman as we did today. Nothing makes sense in the face of Ariel’s absence.